The Logic of the Average Person who Drives in the Snow.
When snow falls...
Parking-lot lines disappear
It is no longer an unspoken rule to kindly park at a reasonable distance from the car next to you. Whether it be 3 feet or 12 feet, it doesn't matter, even if you take up two parking spaces. After all, it's snowing.
Traction remains the same
It is not necessary to anticipate extra time needed to stop. I'm not going to revise my stopping-time when I can stop just fine at this speed when it's warm and dry 87% of the year. After all, it's just snowing.
Blinkers become [more] optional
Even when the conditions are dry, blinkers are always optional. Why should snowy conditions be an exception? A car in the lane next to mine should be anticipating where I'm going--it's their fault if I hit them when I'm merging. "What about road etiquette?" you ask. Well no one's going to get anywhere in life if everyone's nice and passive to each other, and snowy conditions are no exception. After all, it's just snow.
Fish-tailing is a sport, not a warning that I'm losing control
When I'm on I-90 going 65 mph past all those old ladies and paranoid people, my momentum is what drives me in the snow, not my steering. So why not enjoy the floating sensation you get when your car starts to veer sideways? Be a man and work with the drifting like Fast and Furious. I mean really--after all it's just snow.
Snow is soft
If I completely lose control of my vehicle, which is highly unlikely, the snow will cushion any kind of blow on my 40 mph, 1,000 lb careening chunk of metal. It's like driving in pillow-land. It's snowing!
But it's snowing
If I do get in a car wreck, need I remind you that it was snowing? It's hard to maintain control when it's icy and slippery out. Duh. Geeze, give a guy a break.
No comments:
Post a Comment