The Bogo Blog

New video: "Labeler Man."

2010-04-16T14:58:00.000-07:00

"I don't judge... I label."

This was conceived, written, costumed, filmed, AND edited in less than 24 hours.
Be merciful.
Created for Mr. Enumclaw High School 2010 (EHS) competition for Sean Coats, the theme: Superheros.

Restored

2010-04-11T09:39:00.000-07:00

All-time favorite Bible story; from the mind of Beau Chevassus, inspired by the Word of Jesus Christ.

Zombie Rap

2010-03-17T09:14:00.000-07:00

"Yeah, but did Fitty Cent ever get hit at wid a shot gun?
You want a piece of us? No I mean literally."

Featuring SubRocket
Created by Beau Chevassus

Zombie Rap
Extras & Bloopers

Macbeth

2010-02-18T14:16:00.000-08:00

Scroll down to see the trailer I made for a Seattle-based show performed by the Guild of Misguided Professionals.
It is currently touring.

From the press release:

The Guild of Misguided Professionals presents a modern-dress, five-actor rendition of William Shakespeare’s Macbeth.

Among Shakespeare’s most highly regarded plays, Macbeth tells the tragedy of a noble soldier’s descent into monstrosity. The play brings up questions of personal responsibility, the far-reaching effects of one’s actions, and the consequences of unchecked ambition.

The Guild of Misguided Professionals is a Seattle-based acting ensemble founded by Whitworth alumni Matt Park/Parker Matthews (’08) and Alex Smith (’09). The Guild was created in order to create vibrant and accessible productions of Shakespeare’s works. The Guild holds that Shakespeare’s plays can be enjoyed by audiences of all backgrounds and strives to present the Bard’s works in modern, yet faithful, interpretations.

--> Click to see on YouTube. <---

Inspiré / (Seattle Ski Stop-Motion)

2010-02-14T18:49:00.000-08:00

What is our inspiration? Find out...

/ 1,700 photos taken. Over 6 gigabytes.
/ Music used with permission.
/ All copyright logos blurred.
/ Entire stop-motion filmed in downtown Seattle Washington.

We even got a fellow who asked us if we were with the Olympics (Seattle being quite close to Vancouver).
Awesome.

"Ski Tour... anyway you can."

Bit of Seattle

2010-02-10T09:39:00.000-08:00

“My wife and I just prefer Seattle.
It's a beautiful city.
Great setting.
You open your front door in the morning and the air smells
like pine and the sea,
as opposed to bus exhaust.”
-Ronald Reagan

A montage. Filmed by wanderer Beau Chevassus.

Facebook? Follow as a fan!

Viral Concept: Slapstick

2010-02-09T12:21:00.000-08:00

As proven by our annual swirl of Superbowl indoctr–commercials, here we have an amazing exemplification of a viral concept: Slapstick.

Even Focus on the Family has clued into this wonderful concept.

Causing people pain for the sake of laughter has been around since the dawn of humor itself (when Adam said *”WOW! A man would leave his Mom and Dad for that!” when he first saw Eve. See Genesis 2:24). If your sense of humor is remotely close to my own, you would smile merrily each time Costello gets slapped. I could go on for 10 solid hours pointing out key examples of slapstick’s usage in viral media. And I’m sure you would know each and every example.

Use slapstick, but as with all viral concepts, use it wisely. Yes even slapstick humor can be cheapened. A gorgeous example: Jackass, unless of course you are purposefully trying to reach the 11 year old narcissist demographic.

How to use slapstick:
1. Make it unexpected, as with every viral video concept, but with slapstick this is especially key.
2. Make it over-the-top. Barely believable. As in absurdity, NOT violence. Happy Tree Friends, which is closer to the horror genre rather than comedy, is a good example of too much violence. After the horror and disgust, the audience moves on, vowing never to return. Like going to Taco Time.
3. The consequences of the slap is the funniest part. Of course the most common reaction would be to feel hurt, but try flustered, embarrassed, or even happy. The audience wants to see a reaction. Give them one! Nothing is a bigger letdown than a well-delivered slap with a mediocre response.
4. Don’t use kids. Just don’t. It’s not funny when kids get hurt.
5. Optional: It helps to show the audience that the subject is okay (unhurt) after the infliction. Usually parents appreciate this when a child may be watching your film.

Fun fact: From my college days I recall “a slapstick” as literally being an “acoustic device consisting of two paddles hinged together; used by an actor to make a loud noise without inflicting injury when striking someone.” Basically it was stick that made noise when you hit someone on stage. And the audience laughed.

Zombie Rap Test

2010-02-05T12:02:00.000-08:00

(possible music video)

Created by Beau Chevassus.
Uploaded to Facebook Fan Page.

Iron Hoarse (NEW FILM)

2010-01-31T08:05:00.000-08:00

"Be alert. Not inert."

A Documentary.

Created for RockMoto.com's One Day / One Tank Challenge. All music used with permission.
http://www.RockMoto.com/

Have Facebook? Check the awesome fanpage! http://www.facebook.com/pages/Beau-Chevassus/279915931504 Maybe be a fan yourself?

Become a Fan on Facebook!

2010-01-25T15:48:00.000-08:00

[ Beau Chevassus videos on Facebook ]

http://www.facebook.com/pages/Beau-Chevassus/279915931504

If you're on Facebook, be a fan!

Blessed with a good Thumbnail

2010-01-25T13:56:00.000-08:00

The success of a video correlates with the coolness of the thumbnail. The worst mistake YouTube has made ("What?! YouTube has a terrible interface?!") was allowing YouTube Partners to assign thumbnails to their videos. What you get is an overwhelming amount of deceptive thumbnails, which are not even screenshots from the actual video. Thus there is you and me who are destined to upload our videos in blind hope of having one of our three random screenshots turn out to be something exciting. And typically that screenshot is not.

Vimeo and similar services have hit the nail right on the head by providing a large variety of screenshots from which to choose. You can even upload your own thumbnail if you so desire.

"But how do I force YouTube to give me more thumbnail options?"
If you are so desperate to stick with YouTube as the platform to publish your videos, create several versions of your desired video. However in each version extend the length of your video by adding black to the end. For example, in version 1 of your video, add one second of black to the end. Version 2, two seconds, version 3, three seconds, and so on. Then once all are uploaded, browse each video until you find an exciting thumbnail. The algorithm YouTube uses to randomly grab thumbnails is much too complex to crack. I bet they assign thumbnails based upon the phase of the moon. Essentially it's impossible to upload a video to YouTube and tell YouTube to use 1 frame as your thumbnail. It's a gamble.

Cool hint: Even if you are not searching for a good thumbnail, it is always a good habit to add filler (black) on to the end of your videos. YouTube cuts off your video about a 1/2 to 1 second too soon. For example, in Black Coffee (an old video of mine) the original has at least a second buffer at the end. However YouTube has cut off the end, creating a very suddenly unpleasant and jarring end. I'm sure an engineer at YouTube said one day, "If we cut a 1/2 second off of all videos that are uploaded, and if there are 12,000 videos uploaded daily (total length: 1,728,000 seconds of footage), we would cut 1.6 hours of footage, saving our massive servers $25 a day!" Amazing aren't they?

Sometimes someone uploads a video and YouTube pins an awesome thumbnail to their video. Immediately their views skyrocket. This is why I wryly say, "They were blessed with a good thumbnail."

How to get on IMDb

2010-01-16T09:20:00.002-08:00

Just in case none of you know, but it's quite difficult to get on IMDb.
For myself, it has been a personal life goal (yes silly, but challenging). Little did I know but when I submitted my short film Erzfeind to STIFF (Seattle Truly Independent Film Festival) via Withoutabox, once STIFF accepted my film they issued permission to upload the film to IMDb's database. Within 2 weeks, *BAM! There's the film!
Furthermore, if you are a Washington resident and your film was shot in Washington, STIFF waives the entry fee. Just be sure to contact them first asking permission. So the beautiful part? To get my film on IMDb it cost $0.00. How cool is that?

There's my advice! Go out mates, and get yourself a legacy! (God willing of course...)

-Beau Chevassus

Scientifically Fluffin Your Cat

2010-01-15T02:21:00.000-08:00

Scientifically Fluffin Your Cat
I made this video this afternoon.
Here’s the video uploaded in all its glory...
Written, Edited, Performed... basically everything - Beau Chevassus
Animal Trainer - Elizabeth Chevassus
Stunt Work - Petri, Splat, and Roxann
Music - Thomas Robinson

Ezrfeind ("Archenemy" in German) - Ich Will fight video

2010-01-03T07:03:00.000-08:00

Erzfeind - (Epic Clown vs Mime fight)

An age-old feud erupts between a clown and a mime only for an unexpected bond to be found at the end. The rivalry will rage on.

"Erzfeind" ("Archenemy" in German)

Epic Clown vs Mime fight. Crank the volume and rock out.

Total budget for film: $0.99 for the bright red balloon.

Written, directed, produced, and edited by Beau Chevassus.
Creative Director: Parker Matthews.
Mime: Beau Chevassus.
Clown: Brian Hiller.
Magician: James Garner.
Music: Cover of Ich Will (original artist: Rammstein).

Zombie Evacuation Route Sign

2009-12-04T14:12:00.001-08:00

My Dad sent me a picture he took this morning. I thought it was Photoshopped (totally doable) but he said it's quite real and near where he lives. I think it's around 212th and 400th in Enumclaw Wa (until someone takes it down). Awesome.

Epic win.

Apartment Rap - by Lil' White Rapper

2009-12-02T07:12:00.000-08:00

Truly inspired by true events...

Shawn Tolley & Dana Ferguson's Wedding

2009-07-30T10:36:00.000-07:00

Shawn Tolley & Dana Ferguson's Wedding

July 24th 2009 - Parts 1, 2, 3 - Videography by Beau Chevassus

- 60 Second Preview -

- Whole Film -

Notes:

> This page is best viewed using Firefox.

If you are using Internet Exploder, view the video here.

> My personal favorite part is the very end of Part 3. Fun, fun, fun.

> I will be sending out a couple DVDs to Shawn and Dana, but if you are a friend or family member and would like to order a DVD for $10, contact me at: B.eaudacio.us/contact
Running time: just under 60 minutes
I accept PayPal or if you don't have a PayPal account, you may mail a check. Let me know!

Or, you may view using Facebook video, Part 1:

Facebook video, Part 2:

Facebook video, Part 3:

Are Oreo!

2009-03-24T02:04:00.001-07:00

Shortly after I took this picture, the Diary Queen in Auburn WA corrected their sign.
...Though it took them a good 4 or 5 days to do so.

Come Try Are Mint Oreo. Wow.

Jessica and Stefan Robinson's Wedding / Dec 13 2008 / by Beau Chevassus

2009-01-18T13:58:00.000-08:00

Jessica and Stefan Robinson's Wedding / Dec 13 2008 /
by Beau Chevassus

1 - Rehearsal - Jessica and Stefan:

2 - Rehearsal Dinner Part 1 - Jessica and Stefan:

3 - Rehearsal Dinner Part 2 - Jessica and Stefan:

4 - Rehearsal Dinner Part 3 - Jessica and Stefan:

6 - The Ceremony Part 1 - Jessica and Stefan:

7 - The Ceremony Part 2 (Starting with vows) - Jessica and Stefan:

8 - The Ceremony Part 3 (Starting with music) - Jessica and Stefan:

9 - The Reception Part 1 - Jessica and Stefan:

10 - The Reception Part 2 - Jessica and Stefan:

11 - The Reception Part 3 - Jessica and Stefan:

12 - Wellwishes and Bloopers - Jessica and Stefan
Due to the scandalous nature of this footage (sort of), it is tagged so only the following can see this video:
David Robinson
Jessica Robinson
Jonathan Robinson
Stefan 'Lozier Rocks' Robinson
Thomas Robinson

No sympathy...

2008-10-31T19:40:00.000-07:00

When done reading, look at the picture of the lady:

Sympathy?

Beau Chevassus in the Seattle Metropolitan...

2008-10-10T15:33:00.000-07:00

...only thing is, they made it sound like I was the "founder," ("founder along with other founders Matt Park, Danny Moore, and Chris Lozier") and it sounds like I'm totally conceited ("...am a blackbelt...").
Cool that they put me in there, but really strange that journalists exaggerate. THAT NEVER HAPPENS!

...I have to admit though, that is some awesome artwork:

[click to read article]

Top 10 Tips on How to Create a Winning Short Film...

2008-09-05T10:38:00.000-07:00

Incorporate these elements into your short, and you will win billions of film festivals:

1. Have an old person as a character.
Old Lady, Old Man... doesn't matter. I don't get it, but every other film does this and apparently people love it. "Aww!"

2. Have a sketchy opening title.
Nothing too clean, crisp, or professional. Make it look like you it was your first animation piece ever. Or just make it look bad. After all, the less work you put into it, the more people see it as "artistic." (this concept applies towards character development, plot, and camera-handling, etc) (see above picture)

3. Have royalty-free music.
Choose something original. Something that no one else uses.. like big band, jazz, or classical music! YEAH!

4. If you're making a documentary, choose someone who lives on the streets, a crack addict, or a person stuck in a similar situation.
No one minds if you use less fortunate people to manipulate the heart strings of your audience. It's perfectly ethical. Oh wait, "You're helping them by depicting their lifestyle to the world?" Well then you're okay!

5. Don't resolve anything.
If you do have an ending, ditch it. The less your film resolves, the more genius people think you are. If you do resolve a conflict at the end, quickly throw another conflict in so people will tickle their fingertips together and happily wonder, "Oo! I won't know what's going to happen next!" You've succeeded when they leave the theater with nothing but assumptions and guesses.

6. If your video is in black and white, make something bright red.
Audiences are tickled-pink when something with significance "stands out."

7. Audiences love Bush jabs.
Regardless of the absurdity of your claim, blame something on Bush and people will laugh hysterically. "HAR! HAR! HAR! I HATE BUSH TOO!" It never fails.

8. The more depressing the plot, the more philosophical it is.
Philosophical films are never joyful. Besides, who's ever heard of a deep-thinking happy person?

9. Contrast. Overuse it.

Crank it up! The darker the shadows, the more profound your film!

10. Use accents.
British sounds classy... American does not. The more exotic the accent, the more exotic your film-regardless of the merit of your dialogue. Who is more amiable, Tony the Tiger or Toucan Sam?

Bonus tip!

11. Use nudity.

When you're alone and a woman's naked, she's hot.

When she's naked on film, it's art.

Beyond the Glass Mime Sketch...

2008-08-24T19:47:00.000-07:00

Original sketch created by Beyond the Glass Box.

Modern Art - An Original Mime Sketch by Beyond the Glass Box from Beau Chevassus on Vimeo.

One Million Views on YouTube

2008-05-10T19:57:00.000-07:00

On my YouTube account, I've just hit the 1 million views landmark! ...A million people have viewed my work (on YouTube alone). That's a heck of a lot.

Serving drinks and the Lord at St. Mary Resort & Lodge (BOO-YA!)

2008-05-08T09:59:00.000-07:00

Update!

Working this summer at St. Mary Resort!
(though I'll be back in Spokane here and there)
Pull up a stool or grab "one for the road" (yes, they do that Montana... some brag about how many DUIs they've gotten. No joke.). I may be serving up your drink. Or join us for a church service on Sunday. Or attend a Backwoods Ninja Training Seminar. Or "rassle a bear" (courtesy of Matt Park). It's all here at beautiful Glacier National Park.

View Larger Map

Jesus: Identity Theft Victim - Over 50,000 views.

2008-04-27T19:24:00.001-07:00

Jesus: Identity Theft Victim
Report of Views 3/19/08-4/24/08

#	Views	URL
1	2487	http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-gpMChGI5Hk
2	1252	http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wfyhDgD4gNw
3	36	http://vids.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=vids.individual&videoid=30739731
4	34	http://vids.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=vids.individual&videoid=30665992
5	30	http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=-8202581399298782846
6	4182	http://www.dailymotion.com/BeauChevassus/video/x4ruva_jesus-identity-theft-victim_fun
7	20	http://blip.tv/file/758230
8	59	http://www.veoh.com/videos/v6461259zk7jjwht
9	40	http://www.crackle.com/#id=2221779
10	59	http://www.stupidvideos.com/video/commercials/Jesus_Identity_Theft_Victim_2/#72500
11	17	http://www.viddler.com/explore/BEAU/videos/4/
12	403	http://www.geniusrocket.com/video/jesus-identity-theft-victim
13	145	http://www.metacafe.com/watch/1170687/jesus_identity_theft_victim/
14	1542	http://www.godtube.com/view_video.php?viewkey=d24987d85cc16bbb04e6
15	68	http://www.blackturtlemedia.com/videos/show/2182
16	35	http://www.ourstage.com/embed/popup/PVMFMAJWNBLF?autoplay=true&index=1&playlist=true
17	561	http://my.break.com/content/view.aspx?ContentID=479247
18	930	http://www.ebaumsworld.com/video/watch/275915/
19	9	http://video.xanga.com/BeauChevassus/5b30b697486/video.html
20	4039	http://www.spikedhumor.com/articles/147955/Jesus-Identity-Theft-Victim-Jesus-gets-POed.html
21	87	http://uncutvideo.aol.com/videos/5c0f4757046eadac7e7b56572f2af8d5
22	37	http://www.revver.com/video/756548/jesus-identity-theft-victim/
23	12718	http://video.yahoo.com/watch/2233511
24	115	http://video.yahoo.com/watch/2242311/7076327
25	165	http://video.yahoo.com/watch/2233475/7049939
26	37	http://origin.www.spike.com/myspike/BeauChevassus
27	1963	http://www.jibjab.com/view/235604
28	637	http://www.liveleak.com/view?i=d8b_1207015638
29	60	http://www.kewego.com/video/iLyROoafYJMz.html
30	835	http://www.megavideo.com/?v=T51KSROE
31	19	http://www.livevideo.com/video/0A581493FE1B45C3AB9ACDB0B4D2A577/jesus-identity-theft-victim.aspx
32	49	http://www.sharkle.com/video/164778/
33	19240	http://www.tuovideo.it/view_video.php?viewkey=4b2905c799db681b80ce
34	1	http://www.vimeo.com/847321
35	1	http://www.sumo.tv/watch.php?video=3594651
36	23	http://v.youku.com/v_show/id_XMjI4MTkzNTI=.html
37	5	http://profile.imeem.com/NTNNFgH/video/3mLXO7Bl/beau_chevassus_jesus_identity_theft_victim_comedy_video/
38	56	http://www.myvideo.de/watch/3832825
39	111	http://www.watchme.tv/v/?mid=87d76d9c72d0b437182d4c27536b43c2
40	90	http://video.msn.com/video.aspx?vid=28c1e73b-826a-4406-ac50-8c17f204e889
41	41	http://uploads.atomfilms.com/Clip.aspx?key=8584A10A71E5A15E
42	518	http://uploads.atomfilms.com/clip.aspx?key=9330D2F8E5CB7000
43	361	http://www.videosift.com/video/Jesus-Identity-Theft-Victim
44	157	http://www.metacafe.com/watch/1176919/jesus_identity_theft_victim/
45	1	http://www.sumo.tv/watch.php?video=3595323
46	3099	http://www.heavy.com/video/44623
47	na	http://www.collegehumor.com/video:1809525
48	na	http://www.facebook.com/video/video.php?v=506116172565
49	na	http://sclipo.com/user/Beau
	56374 Total	*

This is the fastest I've ever seen a video (ethically) generate views. Needless to say, it's very much worthy of a blog post.

These views represent real people clicking a real mouse to watch this video. These views were not altered or unethically generated by auto-generators, software, ‘bots,’ or deceptive intent, according to Beau Chevassus’ best understanding.

Typical screenshot of my computer...

2008-04-24T20:02:00.001-07:00

(Click for larger)My reaction:

Thanksgiving - Filmed Dance for Whitworth University friend Jeannie Sibbett

2008-04-24T19:42:00.000-07:00

Thanksgiving [33:36]

Dance choreographed by Jeannie Sibbett.

Performed on 4/19/08 at Stage II, Cowles Auditorium, Whitworth University.

Videography by Beau Chevassus, Spokane WA.

Curiously bizarre Indie Music Video [ "Monkey" by Two Loons for Tea ]

2008-04-03T13:12:00.000-07:00

Like independent artists? You'll enjoy this.
Don't like indie music videos? We'd suggest a Jones soda and watching this video on a Mac... then perhaps it'll make sense. (In a curiously absurd sort of way.)

About the video:

""Monkey" Music Video Contest - Two Loons for Tea"
A somewhat whimsical and fanciful take on the song "Monkey" by Two Loons for Tea.
Each character represents both Everyman and an individual persona throughout the course of the video.
Wow. That almost makes it sound snobbish. Or at least intellectual. Anyway, enjoy!

Relay for Life 2008 at Gonzaga University - Never again.

2008-03-29T19:28:00.000-07:00

This morning I was walking in circles.
In the snow.
At 5 am.
With no sleep that night.

I was walking alone, thinking deep thoughts to myself, 'till I wondered if my thoughts were alone. So I bounced some stuff off of the fellow walking next to me. He was a super nice guy, "Matthew Grosodonia" his name turned out to be. Many of the following thoughts we discussed, though I don't want to put words in his mouth, therefore please only hold me responsible for these published opinions:

Summary of Relay for Life - What is it?
For those of you who don't know what it is, Relay for Life is an annually-held event, in this case Gonzaga University was hosting it. The event promotes Cancer Awareness and raising funds for researching cures. The participants pay (donate) through an organized team, then each team is responsible for keeping people walking on a marked course all night long. I think the total time was 13.5 hours a team had to have a member walking. Everyone got a t-shirt, some food, coffee, energy drinks, there were raffle prizes, "root beer pong" (tee-hee! They didn't say, "Beer!"), etc.

It's for a great cause. Awesome.

It also turned out to be one of the stupidest things I've ever done.

Musings - What's the point? To "Raise Awareness."
Rarely am I ever pessimistic about life. If there's good to be found in a situation, I'll let that drive me. But this was a doozie. I'm walking in freakin' circles. Think of all the pointless things you could do to waste your energy. And when I say "pointless" I mean "pointless..." Not "boring" or "difficult to accomplish." Pointless. Here's a list of pointless things I thought up at 5:00 am:

Watching paint dry. (pointless)
Worrying. (pointless)
Voting for Ralph Nader. (pointless)
Walking in circles. (pointless)

But wait there might be a point here--We are walking in circles to "raise awareness." We are making people who see us wonder, "Look at those people! They're going to be walking all-night-long! I wonder why! Oh wait, it says, 'Raise Awareness for Cancer.' Interesting, I never was aware of cancer!"

Think for a moment: Have you ever realized how unbelievably shallow that sounds? ...To "raise awareness?" When I'm debating with someone, and I lay out my whole argument in front of them, it's on a blackboard, my argument is watertight, and the person nods his head and says, "Alright, I understand your point." Then he blinks at me as if "I understand" is a perfectly valid rebuttal. I'm not asking for him to understand! I'm asking him to agree, disagree, or (my gosh) even say, "Let me think about that for a moment," but "understanding," carries no value or merit. It does nothing, therefore it means nothing. It's a filler-fluff word that is designed by our society to resolve conflicts. Our society puts so much emphasis and importance on being tolerant, diverse, and understanding the other's view, people are convinced that's the only thing they need to do. Just understand. No decisions need to be made. I'm blown away at how many bright people's arguments are shut down when their opponent says, "I understand." So what you understand!?

...The same with the phrase "raising awareness." It implies that if you're aware of something, you've done your job, and it's time to move on. "I understand." It has nothing to do with agreeing, disagreeing, or investing time or action. By walking in circles all night, which was a heck of a lot of work, we were encouraging people to be aware of cancer--nothing specific or educational like "This is what a lump feels like in a breast that has cancer," or "Here's a monthly pocket calendar. Use it to remind you to check for prostate cancer." Nope, no action. Just be aware. The correct state of mind is all it takes. By walking in circles all night, we were "Raising Awareness," which technically means if a passerby responded with, "Cancer. huh. Interesting," our job would've been a success.

The fluffy buzzwords "Raising Awareness" may motivate some volunteers, but if "making people aware" is the only result I'm getting out of passerby with all the work, time, and discomfort I'm investing, I say screw it. My standards aren't that low. Get practical people.

Musings - Practically speaking.
To be fair, "Raising Awareness" wasn't the only lofty goal they had in mind at this event. The "raising money to research cancer cures" makes perfect sense. The testimonials of the coordinators who fought or are still fighting cancer were very moving and gave "the cause" personal meaning. That makes sense. We had fun, got a t-shirt, got some food, hung out with friends, and in my case, my wife fulfilled her class assignment. That makes sense. BUT WALKING IN CIRCLES ALL NIGHT LONG, IN SNOW, SLEEP DEPRIVED? Practically speaking, this is ludicrous. It's not "funny," it's not "creative," it's not "random," it's not even over-the-top and 'shocking' (even according to absurdest humor).

I do realize we live in a comfort-driven society where we must fabricate our own discomforts to 'feel alive,' but even these discomforts have a point. For example, extreme sports: They pump the adrenaline, they take skill to master, you can compete, etc. Basically, they're fun. That's the point.

"Prayer walks" are are more serious example. You walk and pray about things you see or things that come to mind. Maybe if they had one marker on the track for Relay for Life where whenever you walked past it, you said a prayer. Now there's a point. Or maybe if there was a certain number of laps each team had to do, and the first place team got a prize. There's point. But nope... no points, no challenges, no goals... "You donated money," which is practical, "Now go walk in circles all night," which isn't even remotely practical.

And to justify it by saying, "It's fun because your friends are there," is simply embarrassing. I try to avoid the term "sheeple," but in this case it applies.

Musings - Last Thoughts
The coordinators provided a grassy area for people to pitch tents and rest when they weren't walking. How thoughtful!

The tents however were about 70 yards away from the speaker system, where the brilliant coordinators kindly kept the live music or country radio at 80 decibels... all night long.
I'd wager less than 1% of the people in the tents got sleep because the music was so loud. I can sleep through anything--earthquakes, thunder storms, you name it. Plus I had silicone earplugs, the most expensive ones I could find. However, the music was turned up so loud, I could feel it--yes, "feel it." That and the freshmen squawking, "OMG! I love this song!" Thus I successfully was apart of the 99%.

Musings - Summary

Never. Again.

Beau in Hollywood, LA California.

2008-03-04T14:28:00.000-08:00

I'm torn between which was better:
The fact that Motion Theory got me accommodations, some cash, and a flight down to Hollywood to shoot a rendition of my 9/11 mime sketch, which will be animated and scored (as in "music"), on Paramount's NY Street with Cinematographers Jack and Peter Green, Choreographer Mary Ann Kellogg, and Director Mathew Cullen, or the fact that I was wearing shorts in February.

Shorts in February. Imagine.

I probably came across as a bright-eyed bushy-tailed guy from Spokane (probably because my goal wasn't "get rich quick." My view: it's kind of obvious when that's someone's goal.), *meh, anyway. I don't want to BS smugness... I had the time of my life, and there's no shame in that. Although it helped that everyone was super-nice. They were very intense and very driven, but still very nice. You don't run into people every day with those qualities, don't-cha-know? Needless to say, I was impressed.
I could go on and on with stories, but for now enjoy some pics! w00t!

Beau Video Blog - Hollywood California and Paramount Studios

Pensees

2008-02-27T13:23:00.000-08:00

Think about it:

You go through all this hard work to make and bake delicious bread, then you go and deliberately burn it ("toast").

They go through all this hard work to make a nice, smooth parking lot, then they go and deliberately build a bump to make it uncomfortable when driving over it ("speed bumps").

Everyday I resist gravity, then I go and pay a hideous amount for equipment and tickets that allow me to fall down mountains ("skiing").
Over and over again.

Thoughts on Gun Restrictions

2008-02-19T13:01:00.000-08:00

> Concealed Weapon Permits (CWP) allow a person to carry a loaded firearm on his body or in his car.
> Assault rifles are made for shooting people.
> All shootings have one thing in common: A gun was used.

Sound scary? People have strong opinions about guns. The knee jerk reaction is to ban guns, or at least to heavily discourage gun purchasing. Basically if guns were obsolete, life would be better.

I'd wager the majority of anti-gun proponents have never shot a gun before. Said again: My guess would be +97% of people who lobby for sanctioning guns have never fired one. Their fear of these weapons is based off of Hollywood stereotypes, hastily-judged personal experiences, or newspaper driven stories about innocent people being "gunned down." Everybody who I have accompanied when they first shoot a gun, responds this way: "That wasn't so bad," or "that was cool," or "that was fun." It's amazing how education and experience greatly reduce the fear of guns, if not erasing the fear completely. It's weird, but when you think about it, it makes sense. Consider this:

Politically-charged fears are always due to ignorance.

Bear with me. Here are some examples:
> A person who works closely with a corporation will disagree with: "Corporations are bad because they get rich by oppressing people."
> A person who is in the health field will disagree with: "Doctors are unethical people who don't really care about their patients."
> A person who works in the legal field will disagree with: "Lawyers are cheating, selfish people who benefit from people's misfortunes."
> A person who has worked hard in life, made educated, careful decisions, and ultimately got rich, will disagree with, "Rich people are lazy and don't deserve their money."
> A person who has worked closely with law enforcement will disagree with: "Cops enjoy bothering people if they can get away with it, especially if the person is a minority."
> A person who has worked closely in the music industry will disagree with: "Rich artists have too much money, so downloading isn't so bad."
> A person who has worked closely in the church will disagree with: "Churches exist just to make money."

Important! There are exceptions to everything. Correction: "fears are not always due to ignorance." Not all lawyers are ethical, not all doctors are saints, and not all churches are holy. The 1% of these people who are unethical give the rest a bad name.

How many rich people have you met are really like Paris Hilton?

Here's what's scary though: People love it when they can generalize based upon that unethical 1%. Deep down inside, some people want all doctors to be bad, probably because of a perfectly valid experience with a careless doctor. They want guns to be bad, because they've experienced the abuse of one. I am not trying to trivialize these abuses, but it is unbelievably shallow to take out one's shock, denial, anger, depression, or confusion on an entire profession or issue--especially without knowingly researching or experiencing those controversial issues.

It's amazing how people don't mind generalizing when they are knowingly ignorant of a profession or issue.

As for guns, the most common defense is:
Guns shoot --> Shooting kills people -->Therefore if guns are taken away, less people die.
This makes sense, but it's not realistic. I could go through dozens of statistical and logical arguments, but I'll just say this:
I'm not saying, "Give a gun to everyone," but when people have experienced shooting a gun and understand the precautions, safety, and etiquette 99% of gun owners have, those people will be much less reluctant to generalize that "guns are dangerous."

One more thing: The point of, "The Right to Bear Arms," was not hunting or recreation. It was self-defense, specifically against an oppressive government. That's why we still have assault rifles.

Barack Obama's Resume.

2008-02-14T13:54:00.000-08:00

There was a fascinating interview on Mike Fitzsimmons' News Commentary...

The chair director for Barack Obama's campaign was answering questions from callers.
One caller asked, "What has Barack done--what is his resume--that would convince me that he'd be an efficient president?"
The Director spoke about how Obama had initiated the FutureGen issue, to which the commentator Fitzsimmons politely corrected the Director, mentioning how Obama only helped revive it, not create it. The Director stood corrected, which was an understandable mistake to make. But then the caller asked...
"So what's point #2?"
...
...silence...
...
Yes, even the Chair Director of Barack Obama's campaign couldn't answer the question, "What has Barack done?"

Obama's campaign emphasizes emotion... "hope," "change," and "a new future."
I've noticed that "emotion" is necessary in an argument when attempting to convince someone.
However, the argument cannot hold water if there is no reason along with that emotion. It's a delicate cocktail, but when mixed correctly, anyone could be convinced. It's not brainwashing, it's just a good argument.
There is no reason or logic in Obama's campaign. This may seem like a harsh accusation, but ask any supporter why Barack would be good for the country, and the supporter will mention how he'll "bring change," but would the supporter mention anything about Obama's track record?
My opinion on the "change" buzzword that's being thrown around: I believe Obama would bring change. Clinton would bring change. Even my stuffed dinosaur Bluey would bring change. The correct answer to, "Do you think Obama will bring change?" is: "Duh!" The correct question is, "How well will Obama implement change?" and "How has Obama implemented change in the past?"

Is this an unfair question?

Every job requires a resume.
Now the most important job in the world is up for grabs, and people aren't asking, "What's Barack's resume?"

This is scary.

McCain or Clinton? Election 2008

2008-02-09T19:20:00.000-08:00

I don't agree with John McCain 100%, but I do disagree with Hillary Clinton 150%.

According to Hillary Clinton (and Obama believes much of the same), we are to:
"Strengthen the middle class."
My response: Yes, that's good. But I don't think we should go about doing it by punishing people who worked hard enough to actually get rich. In my view, over-taxing the rich is redistribution of wealth. If someone responds with, "The rich got wealthy by oppressing the worker," or, "They have too much money," then I'd think I was reading the Communist Manifesto. Don't you think Marx, and all the other countries who failed using this ideology, would be proud?

"Providing Affordable and Accessible Health Care."
My response: Yes, that's wonderful. But I don't think it's the government's responsibility to provide everyone with health coverage.
Do people really think that the government would handle our health efficiently? The government already is doing a swimmingly good job with our DMV, IRS, Dept. of Public Welfare, CBP (Customs and Border Protection), why not give them our health too! It would be a remarkably efficient department, with absolutely no red tape, and I'm sure no one would abuse the system like they're abusing Emergency Rooms right now.
I'm not even going to argue how much our taxes would skyrocket... the sheer inefficiency of this ideology should be enough make people question the fantasies Clinton and Obama are dreaming.
Canadians are already coming here for emergencies... where are we going to go when we have the same system? Mexico?

"End the War in Iraq."
My response: Yes, that's wonderful. But I don't think we should do it by cutting of the Iraqi government's firepower ("us") and then throwing money at the problem.
Funding the UN to mediate the "problem," as if the sectarian parties are but mere school boys is not realistic. I've seen why the Maoist Rebels in Nepal will not dare attack Kathmandu, thus establishing complete Communist dominion over the country. Is it because there are United Nation SUVs frolicking about, spreading peace and tranquility? No. It's because there is a Royal Nepalese machine gun nest on every street corner.
Peace between Iraq's Government and sectarian gangs ("terrorists") is a nice thought, but it's not realistic. Think about it: peace would require comprise. When the Kamikaze started to be implemented, do people really think that we should've "dialogued" with them? No. They wanted to annihilate us. Bombing the Japanese (twice) not only influenced, but it brought about the Japanese surrender. Not all our enemies, past and present, have our same morals or Christian values about life. There are people out there who kill for pleasure. A lot of people refuse to admit this, because it's uncomfortable and tough to handle. No, the insurgents aren't being "misunderstood." Americans need to realize that terrorists aren't lying when they say, "We will destroy the USA."
(Oh, and please drop me a line when someone has thought up a good comprise with death. They would get the Nobel Peace prize every year for the rest of eternity.)

"Promoting Energy Independence and Fighting Global Warming."
My response: Yes, that's wonderful. Oil sucks because our economy is reliant on other countries. At this moment, oil is the most cost efficient (very cost efficient) method of power, especially for vehicles. We've been running on this stuff for years, and until something better comes along, no one's going to bother investing in an alternative. The cliche, "The Stone Age didn't end because we ran out of stones" rings true. It's because iron was more efficient, not because the government outlawed stones or because people felt guilty using rocks. We need to get our priorities straight.

In a nutshell:
1. Profit drives investment.
2. Fuel alternatives need investment.
3. Thus when fuel alternatives reap profit, it will flourish and become more efficient due to investments.

A Green Fad driven by guilt will not drive people to find a fuel alternative (guilt is not a lasting motivation). Forced government stipulations will not make people more willing to invest in fuel alternatives. Last time that happened people had a massive Tea Party in Boston. And just half of the world's scientists and a politician saying it will destroy the earth will not make everyone more willing to invest in fuel alternatives, at least not in the long run.
Here's the motive that needs to be emphasized: Money. It's a sad motivation, but it's realistic. The US will be more independent, more free, more efficient, more profitable (thus more money), if we had a fuel alternative. That's the way to convince people to be Green. Not guilt, a fad, or government stipulations.
Admit it... when we get down to brass tacks, people buy energy-saving lightbulbs because it saves money.

How to be Popular & Cool - Four Tips and Tricks

2008-02-03T13:39:00.000-08:00

#1. Never blatantly acknowledge excitement, funniness, or awkwardness.
What not to do: Situation is a bunch of people standing around at a good party, laughing, talking, snacking, etc. You say, "Hey everyone! Isn't this a great party!" Everyone quietly takes a sip and reminds themselves never to talk to you again. Never acknowledge excitement.
Why this is true, is because you're trying too hard. You're not confident. This leads us to #2...

#2. Whatever you do, do it with confidence.
What not to do: You've had a bad stomach ache all day. You go to push a door open, and you fart. Sure it's a mistake, but everyone's human. At least 5 people behind you heard it. You don't say anything and embarrassingly cough as if they misheard the fart. People quietly walk past you and remind themselves never to talk to you again.
Even if it's mistake, do it with confidence. Don't be stuck-up. Laugh at your accidents. Be confident.
Why this is true, is because everyone makes mistakes and is embarrassed by them. If someone makes a mistake, and he shrugs it off, all of the sudden this confident person becomes everyone's icon--he has dominated something everyone else is still struggling with. But, don't be stuck-up about it. This leads us to #3...

#3. Be nice.
What not to do: Someone walks onto the bus, and you're sitting in the back. Technically there's an empty space next to you. You don't want this annoying guy to sit next to you, so you move your legs over so it covers the space next to you. This guy has to sit alone up front. ("My gosh he would've been annoying.") He never talks to you again.
The one's who are rude because they have so much confidence make a lot of friends (they claim they "don't care."). But they never stop to think they make twice as many enemies. If you're considerate to people, you ultimately make twice as many friends as enemies.
The ones who say, "I don't care," might attract a few shallow-minded followers, but the reality is, everyone knows he or she cares way too much. Almost to the point of being embarrassing.
For example, a gothic girl is always cussing people out and being mean. She "doesn't care what other people think," and she "doesn't need to fit-in." Is she being "confident?" No, she's joking herself. She's cares what the goth crowd thinks, and she's certainly trying to "fit into" the rebellious crowd. She's fooling herself, and everyone knows it. She's still trying to fit in.
Another example: A chick is always checking her makeup in a little purse mirror. She checks herself at least 3 times a class. Sometimes she smears on cotton candy flavored lip gloss. She sits next to the hottest guy in class. She's alway texting on her pink cell phone that's smaller than a credit card. And guess what? She looks beautiful. And she's confident. She does it all in front of everyone and she doesn't care what they think.
YEAH.
RIGHT.
Her whole life revolves around what others think of her... she never bothers to be nice or talk to a nerdy guy because she's so full of herself. I'm not saying that trying to look beautiful is bad, but it gets bad (and embarrassing) when that's all she care about. And ultimately people say, "Oh her? She's full of herself... (she's never tried to talk to me)."
This is my goal: Someday, when people look back and remember me, I want them to say, "Oh yeah, Beau? He was a really nice guy."
I don't want them to remember: "Beau? Oh yeah, he was so full of himself."
Be nice.

#4. Don't try to be in just one crowd.
Make it your goal to be comfortable walking up to any crowd--whether it be the druggies, XC, football, volleyball, hicks, band geeks, theater dorks, emos, Christians, Mormons, goths, Mexicans, student body, gamers, car junkies ("grease monkeys"), or partiers--be comfortable talking (and getting along with) any crowd. This means being confident and nice. When someone says your name, they should not be to pin-point the crowd you're in. If you are able to manage this feat, you will be the coolest person in anyone's eyes.
Don't try to be in just one crowd.

Beau's Thoughts on Humor

2008-02-01T01:31:00.000-08:00

The Connections and Progression of Good Comedy.

Something fascinates me about the humor of Far Side--arguably the best cartoon strip of all time.

Do you ever notice that the caption (text) is completely reliant upon the cartoon (image), and vise versa? That is, the joke will not be understood unless the audience makes the connection (the "discovery") between what they see and what they read.

Audiences love making discoveries. The gasp, the ah-ah!, the satori moment is what convinces the crowd that the humor is brilliant--because they believe they are being brilliant.

There are far too many examples of the alternative, where everything is spelled out for the idiot Sunday comic reader. For example, Family Circus:How is this remotely clever?

("TEE-HEE! CHILDREN DON'T WRITE BLOGS! THAT'S ABSURD!")

How about Marmaduke? Now there's a clever comic!

("HAR! HAR! HAR! DOG'S DON'T HUG! THAT'S SO FUNNY!")

This is a rare exception--a Marmaduke that's actually clever:

Now we talk about progression of humor, often using the "rule of threes." (Usually follows a pattern: funny, funnier, funnest. Or normal, normal, absurd. Mix-and-match.) I consider Dilbert a perfect comic that exemplifies this progression. I call Dilbert "smart humor" because there's always a clever progression, not just a clever observation or outrages situation. Notice how the first frame is always a 'funny' or 'absurd' setup. The second frame bounces off of the first frame's idea, and finally climaxes on the third.

Humor. There's a lot to it, and no, I don't know everything about it. Most of my experience is derived from trial and error (emphasize the error).

Basically, don't think just a clever statement is going to be funny when it's unsupported by context (i.e. it's "random"), or it's devoid of life-relevance (i.e. it's "pointless").

More notes coming soon regarding:

> Acknowledging excitement or funniness is the quickest way to snuff it out.
> Sarcasm is awesome, but what are the effects of excessive sarcasm? Is it different from dry humor?
> How to be "funny." Don't push it. (i.e. don't say to yourself, "I've got to make these people laugh.")
> Slapstick humor: Laughing at other's misfortune? Or laughing at absurdity?
> If it's not true, it's not funny.

The Incompatibility of Logic and Snow-Driving

2008-01-29T12:47:00.000-08:00

The Logic of the Average Person who Drives in the Snow.

When snow falls...
Parking-lot lines disappear
It is no longer an unspoken rule to kindly park at a reasonable distance from the car next to you. Whether it be 3 feet or 12 feet, it doesn't matter, even if you take up two parking spaces. After all, it's snowing.

Traction remains the same
It is not necessary to anticipate extra time needed to stop. I'm not going to revise my stopping-time when I can stop just fine at this speed when it's warm and dry 87% of the year. After all, it's just snowing.

Blinkers become [more] optional
Even when the conditions are dry, blinkers are always optional. Why should snowy conditions be an exception? A car in the lane next to mine should be anticipating where I'm going--it's their fault if I hit them when I'm merging. "What about road etiquette?" you ask. Well no one's going to get anywhere in life if everyone's nice and passive to each other, and snowy conditions are no exception. After all, it's just snow.

Fish-tailing is a sport, not a warning that I'm losing control
When I'm on I-90 going 65 mph past all those old ladies and paranoid people, my momentum is what drives me in the snow, not my steering. So why not enjoy the floating sensation you get when your car starts to veer sideways? Be a man and work with the drifting like Fast and Furious. I mean really--after all it's just snow.

Snow is soft
If I completely lose control of my vehicle, which is highly unlikely, the snow will cushion any kind of blow on my 40 mph, 1,000 lb careening chunk of metal. It's like driving in pillow-land. It's snowing!

But it's snowing
If I do get in a car wreck, need I remind you that it was snowing? It's hard to maintain control when it's icy and slippery out. Duh. Geeze, give a guy a break.

2008-01-26T17:19:00.000-08:00